Seeking Joy
My heart is heavy. I have been thinking for a while about loss. Loss is never easy to come to terms with, to accept. It is work, a work in progress. We have experienced loss in large and small ways over time, but a recent loss is weighing heavily today. Part of its weight comes from not knowing, not understanding, not seeing where the consequences will fall in the future. It is not a death, but a separation-- and I am left wondering if this is somehow much much worse. Worry over the potential for damaging another, something I can not consciously intend to do, not now, not ever.
Today, the post by Ann Voskamp is called When You're Seeking Happiness and I am once again struck by God's amazing timing. He has ways of sending me messages through others, through situations and words of wisdom. I really need to work on leaving everything with Him! This loss I speak of is not likely to subside any time soon, yet I know I can go to Him for comfort.
At the beginning of my cancer journey, I purposed to surround myself with positive. I chose to listen to positive messages, to shun negative thoughts and people. I continue to seek this and find myself absolutely disgusted when I am privy to information that is neither uplifting nor edifying. I am especially bothered when it comes from me! But I have noticed I am bothered for a long time after conversations which are not kind, which are not positive and where people refuse to see the good in another person. These situations are often difficult to avoid--and I seem not to be gifted at helping a person turn away from their frame of mind! There are a few examples of this in the last few months which come to mind and they bother me because I am concerned about the relationships which may be damaged because of this way of thinking. I can go ahead and choose for myself how I would like to think, but most unfortunately, I cannot decide for others. This leads me to today, where I am choosing once again to dwell on the positive. I can not always avoid negative thoughts or negative people, but by choosing joy I can change how I think and hopefully give others an opportunity to look at life from a more positive frame of reference. Today, I find myself thankful for:
~sunny weather, long walks and talks with friends
~memories prompted by cleaning, when coming across pictures and papers and books
~family--planned visits, unplanned phone calls, keeping in touch wherever we are
~11 1/2 years of a lifetime, something to keep in my heart
~vacations, refreshing for the soul
~aurora borealis, a heavenly gift
~babies in waiting, mothers to be
~red and orange and yellow and brown and all shades between, the colours of Fall!
~joy, reflected through the choices within
~together time- hunting with family, picking mushrooms or sitting over tea
~curls
~pretty pink carnations, frilly with scent and surprise
~dreams on paper, taking exams to measure the understanding and wisdom of years--I am praying for you, my friend!
This list is certainly blessing my heart as I take time to pause and reflect. I don't limit it to Mondays, but it is a good habit to start my week with this mindset, a way of disciplining my thoughts. Once again, for so much, for such plenty, I am grateful!
Today, the post by Ann Voskamp is called When You're Seeking Happiness and I am once again struck by God's amazing timing. He has ways of sending me messages through others, through situations and words of wisdom. I really need to work on leaving everything with Him! This loss I speak of is not likely to subside any time soon, yet I know I can go to Him for comfort.
At the beginning of my cancer journey, I purposed to surround myself with positive. I chose to listen to positive messages, to shun negative thoughts and people. I continue to seek this and find myself absolutely disgusted when I am privy to information that is neither uplifting nor edifying. I am especially bothered when it comes from me! But I have noticed I am bothered for a long time after conversations which are not kind, which are not positive and where people refuse to see the good in another person. These situations are often difficult to avoid--and I seem not to be gifted at helping a person turn away from their frame of mind! There are a few examples of this in the last few months which come to mind and they bother me because I am concerned about the relationships which may be damaged because of this way of thinking. I can go ahead and choose for myself how I would like to think, but most unfortunately, I cannot decide for others. This leads me to today, where I am choosing once again to dwell on the positive. I can not always avoid negative thoughts or negative people, but by choosing joy I can change how I think and hopefully give others an opportunity to look at life from a more positive frame of reference. Today, I find myself thankful for:
~sunny weather, long walks and talks with friends
~memories prompted by cleaning, when coming across pictures and papers and books
~family--planned visits, unplanned phone calls, keeping in touch wherever we are
~11 1/2 years of a lifetime, something to keep in my heart
~vacations, refreshing for the soul
~aurora borealis, a heavenly gift
~babies in waiting, mothers to be
~red and orange and yellow and brown and all shades between, the colours of Fall!
~joy, reflected through the choices within
~together time- hunting with family, picking mushrooms or sitting over tea
~curls
~pretty pink carnations, frilly with scent and surprise
~dreams on paper, taking exams to measure the understanding and wisdom of years--I am praying for you, my friend!
This list is certainly blessing my heart as I take time to pause and reflect. I don't limit it to Mondays, but it is a good habit to start my week with this mindset, a way of disciplining my thoughts. Once again, for so much, for such plenty, I am grateful!
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