Grateful Heart and Helping Hands

Seems as though my posts are getting fewer and farther between. Life is running by at an alarming rate and I am doing my best to keep up. So, for no other reason than simply for the discipline of writing, hello to you! My man asks abut my blog, looking forward to, I think, some glimpse of my life, my thoughts. Something about not being a mind reader, so he uses this method? I am not sure, but nevertheless, I appreciate his encouragement. This last week, I spent most of the week in Vancouver. What an inspiring week! I met with a friend one day and we whiled away hours over lunch and tea, getting to know the heart of one another. Previously, we met in a teacher-student capacity, yet, I think, we knew we would bridge that and make it to friends. I am so glad we have! I am blessed to have many inspiring women in my life. Another friend picked me up at my hotel and we spent a portion of our day together- over lunch, antiques, cranky dogs and good laughs. Again, I find myself so grateful f...

A couple of days ago, I posted all of Psalm 139. Today, I was sent a link that resonates soundly deep within my heart and spirit. We are so fearfully and wonderfully made! This will take about 15 minutes to watch, but please do, it is worth while! Our Master Designer knew these things when He created us--how marvelous, how wonderful! So, without further ado, here it is--enjoy and ponder--and I will be eternally grateful! Annie Murphy Paul speaks on Origins

Sun sitting on the shoulder of the mountain, shadowing pink in the ice mist. A long drive past the thickly crusted winter river, where nutrients lay in wait for the next salmon run. Thoughts dart in and around my head as I prepare to meet with another birthing client. This work, this doula calling, educator and mentor, friendship bond within giving foundation to my raison d'etre. I take time to contemplate how being a doula has impacted me in other aspects of my life and am drawn inexplicably to the thought of aging parents. One who is close to my heart speaks of caring for ill and aging parents, not as if it drains all of her personal and emotional and financial resources, but instead builds them up. She speaks of family bonds, drawing closer and of caring for a toddler aged parent, still considering their dignity and pride in the moment ahead of her own. Esteem and respect colour her choices, beautifully aware of how this will foster the same in her own children as she ages. My ...

The header picture is entirely appropriate. The snow is piled higher and deeper than ever. A breeze has knocked the snow out of the trees, though, and the sun is shining weakly through the clouds above. The mountain top is obscured in the clouds as well, creating a sense of a warm cloud duvet above. Unfortunately, the duvet is not a warm one, rather one of super cold as we plummet past -19C. The breeze is gently strumming in the wind chimes outside my kitchen window and I am sitting at my kitchen table with mukluks on. This is a good place to be with the weather out there. My favourite blog - the one that both convicts and encourages me- has challenged me to add joy to my gratitude. I have enjoyed this, noticing that 'enjoy' encompasses joy. Each day, I find myself become more aware of what I am grateful for and how that in turn promotes joy. Relationships grate less, give more. The little things become the important things. And I notice, with some discomfort, when others I ho...

Why would I have a hard time imagining that I could be someone to look up to? I disappoint myself in so many ways every single day! Today, a friend told me she always wants to sing my praises, that she looks up to me. Really? How terrifying!  We work in the same field and she is one I always think of in terms of excellence. I find that through disappointing myself, I am concerned that someone else who would rely on me would also be sorely disappointed. So much of my life has been spent seeking approval. Not praise, per se, but approval. From very young, I learned that little things would disappoint. I learned that others can set standards for me that I may never be able to attain. I learned that standards can change at a whim, that they are not stagnant but dynamic, depending on mood, expectations, personality and even power. I learned especially not to trust what I believed, that others would and should tell me just what it was I should be doing and being. My adult life has been...

My man enjoys my blogs. I kinda dried up there for a week or so--either not wanting to spend the time on the computer or simply taking a break  pause! The house is nice and quiet, clean and organized. Christmas has passed quietly this year, but we had a few nice opportunities to be in touch with family and friends. The letter I posted for my last posting of 2011 was my first Christmas letter in 3 years. I know I love to hear from folks near and far, so I did send a few letters out to some we have tried to keep in contact with. I am also pretty glad for email, blogs, facebook and other types of social media that give a broader opportunity. But here we are, 4 days into 2012. One of the first questions I hear is, "Did you make any resolutions?" Personally, I am not one for resolutions or another chance to fail at personal discipline. However, I have made some decisions that I hope will impact the future for the better. My future. I weigh more than I have in my life, thanks to ...